A great big farewell to routines and expectations on my birthday.
Kimmy is back today with a post. I hope you enjoy!
This past weekend was my 21st birthday…WOOT WOOT. No, but actually, being the grandma that I am (and proud of it!!!) I had a super sweet birthday without going full-on crazy. It did get me thinking, though. I definitely did feel pressure for my 21st birthday to be the end-all be-all of birthday celebrations. I felt there was an expectation that my 21st birthday should look a certain way / follow the typical 21st birthday routines that others have.
There’s a reason why humans are creatures of habit. Routines create a sense of mental security. They help us create order and minimize risk. But at some point, jumping in blindly is worth it. Breaking routines and our own expectations actually usually creates the opposite effects than what we think will happen. It’s proven that creativity and productivity is boosted following these moments. It’s also easier to break out of your boundaries in the future. This process is called productive discomfort–basically, over time, your tolerance for anxiety will increase, as will your cognitive flexibility.
So my 21st birthday looked like…
I ate cupcakes the minute it was officially my birthday with a glass of champagne. I had a cupcake for breakfast with my roommate the next morning, and a mimosa when I got home. I had an ice blended daiquiri (honestly they could have given me a virgin drink and I wouldn’t have known the difference) with appetizers at lunch, and I enjoyed numerous sweet treats and silly drinks throughout the afternoon. I definitely ate past hunger cues, but honestly, I was eating for pleasure, for taste, and for the memories. I am 1000% sure that if I hadn’t, I would have felt deprived. I wore the silly crown my sister bought me and I let my family spoil me. I got goosebumps from the sweet and funny messages I received throughout the day.
When I was struggling hard, I never would have allowed myself a day like this, or if I had, I would have been future-tripping about the consequences of each and every thing and wouldn’t even have been able to enjoy any of it. On this birthday, I had every intention of treating myself like my own best friend, though, so I did. Because I wanted to set an intention for the rest of the year.
….but I still rush past the wine aisle in Trade Joe’s because I keep expecting someone to tell me that I can’t be there.
….aaaand this is how my mom forever immortalized me ending my birthday by putting on a nose strip because pore-care is self care, am I right?