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Yeah…Immaeatthat

Dec 23

a way to live according to your values in 2019

With arguably the biggest go-on-a-diet push just around the corner on New Years Day, I thought it’d be timely to share an activity that can set you up for a healthful and empowering 2019. An activity to help you live according to what you value. If you’d like to read a post on Why Not to Go on a Diet This Year...there it is.

This post was born out of my love for hearing about other people’s schedules. Since becoming a mom I now specifically like hearing how other moms make work and life fit together. This Fall I started reading a book called I Know How She Does It by Laura Vanderkam. The book discusses the findings from The Mosaic Project, a project which involved collecting and analyzing time logs from women who earned more than $100,000/yr and had at least one child (under age eighteen) living at home. Vanderkam found women who had “placed the tiles of their professional and personal worlds together in ways that [gave] them space to strive towards their dreams at work and home.” The book shares numerous time logs from these women and I found it so interesting to see the different ways these mom’s pieced their lives together to align with their values. 

So I decided to track my time and wanted to share. If you can’t read the below you may need to click on the time log and then zoom in. If you’d like to track your own time, you can get access to Vanderkam’s time tracker here.

I’d say the week I tracked was pretty typical for me. The two differences were that 1) I wasn’t feeling well and 2) Jo was with me Thursday morning and she is typically with one of her grandmas that day. So that impacted a few areas, but nothing too drastic. I found I:

  • mom-ed 70 hours (playing, reading, meals together, Andrew was with us helping some of this time + a lot of this time is multitasking – housework while watching Jo, running errands while watching Jo, etc.)
  • slept 59 hours (8.4 hr/night average – YAY!)
  • worked 25 hours (clients or blog)
  • watched TV 6 hours
  • bible studied 5 1/2 hours
  • therapy / doctor appt  2 1/2

Overall I feel pretty good about how I spend my time.

I don’t always find at-home mom-life super fulfilling, which I think is normal, but this is something I want to think about going into 2019. When I think about being more joyful in motherhood I think I need to be around other mom’s who are in similar life stages more often. A tagline for a local mom’s group is “it takes a village to raise a mom.” Made me laugh, but I feel it’s very true. I have to remind myself that this stage of life I’m in right now is temporary. We have ZERO plans of homeschooling, so in 4 years Jo will be in school. We want more children (not sure how many more – Andrew and I would give you a different answer if asked). But accepting the slow (yet exhausting) pace and demanding nature of motherhood has been a struggle for me. Right now, I prefer the majority of my time to be with Jo (and am glad this is an option for us), but I think the exact amount of work I do will continue to shift for the next 5-10 years. Seeing clients 2 days a week for me is a constant I like having, but blog work and other creative endeavors will flux in amount of time spent on them depending on the sacrifice motherhood will call me to make. I’d like to find a bible study workbook on motherhood, but I haven’t come across any that look right. Any recommendations?

I want the majority of 2019 to be about obedience to God, which I do think my work falls under (God has given me a great plot of land to serve – helping women lay down the idol of their body and self that has resulted from living in our broken world). I’d also like to be more diligent with bible studying, which I think may have me looking for a second kid-friendly bible study to help keep me accountable.

Health is also a value of mine and something I’ll continue pursuing. From week to week different things will get prioritized based on my needs and available time – doctors appt, sleep, therapy, recharge time, and movement all fall into the health category.

Instead of seeking body change in 2019, identifying your values and tracking your time to be sure you are living according to what you value may be a better use of your year.

Happy New Year to all! This is the last post of 2018. I look forward to another year with all of you in 2019!

18 comments on “a way to live according to your values in 2019”

  1. Risen Motherhood (website/blog AND podcast) is a great resource! They apply the gospel to motherhood and offer many resources/suggestions for personal and child bible study.

  2. Not exactly a Bible study but any book by Sally Clarkson on motherhood will bless you tremendously! Also, I swore I would never homechool… currently ordering books for our 10th year of homeschooling, so you never know! 😆

  3. Kylie,

    You are beautiful in every possible way.  God bless you, Andrew and Jo in 2019.  Thank you for blessing all of us!

    Xoxo,

    Julie

  4. I just love everything about this post!  I struggle so much this time of year with all the diet resolutions. I spent so many years trying to change my body and missing out on life. Being a mom myself with 2 kids I struggle to fit it all in and love the intention of living my values in 2019. Intuitive eating is a goal of mine and I am so much stronger than I was even 6 months ago. Thank you for your words and encouragement!  It’s so refreshing to read your posts!!!  Also bible study is on my list of values to prioritize!  

  5. Missional Motherhood and Treasuring Christ When our Hands are Full, both by Gloria Furman, have been recommended to me (not studies, just books). They are both on my reading list.

  6. I definitely think this would be a good idea for me in the new year! I’m almost afraid to look at my current schedule and see how much wasted time I spend on the internet or tv or mindless phone stuff. More time should be spent on things I actually care about!!

  7. I absolutely love this! Thanks so much for sharing! :)

  8. Ditto to anything Risen Motherhood or Sally Clarkson, and I would also throw Jess Connolly into the mix (she’s less motherhood focused & more running on mission, but her books/podcasts are so encouraging to me). Prayers for a restful, memory filled end to 2018- and you’re not alone in your motherhood musings. Thanks for being vulnerable!

  9. I know your plate is already overflowing, but have you considered that maybe the reason that bible study workbook on motherhood is so hard to find is because it’s waiting on you to write it? Your words are so eloquent and powerful; I would happily read anything you wrote!

  10. thank you for sharing…I keep trying to remember when I get frustrated with not being able to put more time into other things that I likely don’t have that many years with my little one (we live in a very expensive school area so we might be homeschooling but not sure…) I know now lays the groundwork and I don’t want to look back once she is in school and wish I had spent less time on my other pursuits. And I am so grateful for your blog!! as one recovering from disordered eating there is so little in the Christian world especially that talks about these things!

    • Hi CK! Your comment reminded me of something–>

      I’m currently reading Preach to Yourself by Hayley Morgan and she was talking about how when mothering littles the sameness of everyday can be exhausting…with nothing too high and nothing too low. “You reach a point where you realize you haven’t been talking about anything other than what you’re doing every day. Not how it’s going or why you’re doing it. Just what is happening.” Made me think about how it’s good to have something to stimulate your mind so your mind isn’t “running wild with neglect.” Even if it’s just reading a (non-parenting) book to have other ideas coming in other than “take child to doctor at 1pm. Change diaper.”

      Thought that all was relevant here! Motherhood has VERY much been an adjustment for me with learning to spend less time on other pursuits, but still having something going on (even something small) that doesn’t take up a lot of time to stimulate my mind (I just accidentally typed “stimulate my MILK” there lol). It’s tough.

      And thanks for letting me know you’re grateful for the blog<3

  11. St. Luke’s United Methodist on Westheimer has so many bible study options with childcare available. You can find out more on the website. They also have an app with all of the information as well.

  12. Phylicia Masonheimer is a bible teacher and she talks a ton about motherhood, keeping a home, discipleship, etc. She is very active on Instagram and has a website that is full of awesome information!

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