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Yeah…Immaeatthat

Jun 17

5 thoughts.

1. Set point weight range.

I’m working on a post on set point weight range. If you have lived within your set point weight range for a bit, what realizations have you found?

2. The most satisfying meal I’ve had in awhile.

This past weekend we spent some time with family and my sister whipped up this Everything Bagel Breakfast Casserole. My favorite breakfast currently is something savory paired with an iced vanilla latte, so from the beginning this was right up my alley.

She let it soak overnight and the texture took on a bread pudding-esque quality that I found particularly satisfying and the most satisfying meal I’ve had in some time. Next time I make it I’m going to do half the amount of cream cheese, since the cream cheese was the only part I found myself wishing there wasn’t quite as much, but I’m not a huge cream cheese lover and you may be.

It was so tasty I had it for breakfast and shortly after had what was left of it for a morning snack, as seen below…

3. New books on the girls bookshelf.

In light of everything going on in the U.S., a good friend recommended a few books for the girls bookshelf and one was The Day you Begin. It has a unifying message on how some may appear different than the majority, yet hearing people’s stories allows us to find connection. I start crying at the same part every time. I think it’s a book everyone can relate to, since I imagine everyone has had situations where we don’t feel like we belong and know how lonely that is.

4. Not reading DMs on Instagram any more.

They’re just too much. Lately I’ve been finding myself wishing for a social media free life. The majority of my close friends use social media very sparingly so I feel the pull to do this as well. So, if I seem absent on Instagram, it’s because I am. I’m getting on, posting, and then deleting the app off my phone. I don’t want Instagram as part of my life anymore. I want my energy, time, and bandwidth for immaEATthat to be spent here on the blog. I say this not for pity or to be woe is me, I know I’m very fortunate to have all aspects of immaEATthat as part of my career, but just so you know that if you want to get in touch, blog comments or email is the best way to do that! I don’t want anyone frustrated I don’t respond to their DMs.

5. I made cobbler.

My dad brought us some peaches and I put them in this cobbler. It was so good. It’s going to be my go-to cobbler recipe!

I hope you’re having an okay week and finding ways to care well for yourself. We have been utilizing one of our babysitters more and are on the verge of change as the girls will start back at their daycare in July. I. Can. Not. Wait.

44 comments on “5 thoughts.”

  1. I’m excited to read your post about set point weight range. I admire your decision to stop using Instagram. I’ve noticed lately I think it creates some anxiety, but I have a huge fear of missing out, or fear that I won’t have access to magical information. Did you struggle with any of that when deciding to back away?

    • Hi Haley! Yeah everyone is wired differently. I don’t think instagram helps me learn and process through things. There are some home decor/DIY instagrammers I love that I’ll continue to check in on via googling their IG account, but overall if I want to learn something I think reading a book on it is a better fit for me to actually learn/change on x topic…resources that are more thorough than an instagram post/caption. I actually feel I miss out more on relationship depth by being on instagram with me ending up just sharing on IG when I could text a friend the same thing and connect on a one-on-one level. So for me, I feel instagram is making me miss out. Glad you’re excited for the set point weight range post!! I am too!

  2. Hey Kylie!

    What was the podcast you were recently interviewed on?? I remember you sharing it but I don’t remember what it’s called. Thank you!!

  3. Sure grateful for all you share. I totally feel you on the Instagram thing.

  4. I love that you’re incorporating books on diversity and inclusion into your kid’s bookshelf!! Anti-racism needs to start early. 

  5. Hi Kylie! I am excited for a post about Weight Set Point Range. I have been within my set point range for about 3 years now. I had a daughter in 2017 and was amazed at how my body just landed at a weight and again I had a son in December and my body basically returned to the same exact weight. I was again amazed. I didn’t over exercise or restrict or do any eating disorder behaviors as I would have done in the past…my body just landed where it landed. This has made it easier with clothes shopping because the clothing I had before I got pregnant fit fairly comfortably, I had to buy a few bigger items. It again was an interesting process this time around vs feeling scary,

    A blogger (she is somewhat diet-culturey so be warned) recently posted this blog post https://mikaperry.com/why-i-decided-to-quit-social-media/ and it was really interesting. I have deleted instagram and facebook for the entire summer I decided and I have been SO much happier and had less anxiety and less issues with my body and comparing my life to others.

    Love your blog!

    • I read the blog post you linked. I enjoyed it. This part rang true for me as one of the worries of ditching Instagram…”I did wonder how I would stay up to date on trends, know what’s going on, or get information on products, services, etc. without Instagram. I realized that it would mean I would have to go browse stores, read print articles, and ask people questions in person.”….I think I know that Instagram has not itself been healthy, but sometimes it has pointed out where to go for information. What are good articles or other ways you would recommend knowing about good books, podcasts, etc that are out right now?

      • Hi Haley! Something I have been doing is subscribing to my favorite blogs. Instead of aimlessly searching the internet I am getting exactly what I want to read right to be inbox. I have found a lot of bloggers share their favorite books, podcasts, etc. I also felt like there is SOOO much sharing of things on instagram like Kylie talks about the noise- it is too much noise for me and almost too many books and podcasts…not having insta has really helped me prioritize.

        • Yes, I agree about the noise. There’s no possible way to keep up with every book, podcast, etc, etc. I’m hoping cutting way back on Instagram helps me too. Thanks for the feedback.

    • Yes, Liz! That post from Mika is so good. I too have felt that prompting to “let it go” so often. Glad you shared it!

  6. Looking forward to your post on set-point range. I think I’ve finally hit mine as with reasonably balanced eating and exercise my body has been about the same size (based on how my clothes fit), with a few minor fluctuations during stressful/busier times for the past 2-3 years. Its freeing to know that my body is able to regulate itself, so I don’t have to be afraid of eating too much/not exercising enough and my weight changing, which used to be a constant fear for me.
    The challenging thing was feeling disappointed that my set weight was higher than I thought it “should” be. I had to let go of the concept of my “perfect” body and what that was meant to look like, and the feeling that I had to keep striving to attain it

    • That you for writing this comment, Esther. I am weight restoring and trusting my body to find its set point. I am definitely disappointed and angry and sad that my set point is not where I was before. It is definitely a grieving process.
      I will get there soon and will accept and welcome the health and vitality that comes with letting go of controlling my body.

    • Thanks for sharing, Astrid and Esther!

  7. Yay blog! Love this :)

  8. I deleted Facebook, instagram, and pretty much all other forms of social media about a year ago. At first I would feel this random pull to pull it up, but I would take that energy and reach out to someone on a more personal level. After a few weeks I realized I had so much less anxiety and I was able to focus more. It’s been a year and I don’t miss it at all. Kudos to you for realizing that it is not for you and acting on it, that is the hardest part.

    • Yes! I love this! When you feel that tug to get on social media and connect, instead use that as a prompting to reach out to an IRL friend.

  9. My adult wt fluctuated withing a 10# range, I always freaked out when it got at the high end and would diet until I got lower, but gradually my weight would always increase again. Once I decided to stop with the dieting I got to the upper end of that 10# range and stopped gaining. I was honestly shocked that I didn’t continue to gain, that was always the fear, that I would continue to gain! The higher number took a bit to wrap my head around but when I saw that I could eat intuitively and exercise moderately and maintain that number I really had no desire to jump into restrictive eating and all that entails. I also found that at my set point I don’t binge or think obsessively about food. I don’t crave sweets like I used to, probably because I’m not actively restricting and I let myself eat what I want. Don’t get me wrong, I have never had an eating disorder however I can definitely see that my efforts to control my weight led to disordered behaviors and a disordered relationship around food. Intuitive Eating has pushed me to abandon the desire to lose and restored my relationship with food.

  10. I’m looking forward to your post on weight set point. I have stayed right around the same weight for almost a year, and during that time have been eating food that feel good and satisfying and moving my body in a joyful way and have overall been happier than ever. BUT I keep thinking “well this can’t be my weight set point…I am wearing a larger size than I can usually find in stores and my BMI is in a category that always gets me comments from the doctor”. It takes a lot of work to overcome those thoughts and remember that I am happy, healthy and the clothes are supposed to fit my body, not the other way around. I’m turning 30 in a few weeks so I’ve been thinking a lot about weight set point because I have seen that as a boogeyman for so long in pop culture of your body going “downhill” after 30 and I am resisting trying to do anything to change my body before that milestone.
    I got rid of social media and I am amazed how much more clear and less cluttered my thoughts feel. I’m able to follow a train of thought father when I’m not just reading snippits and captions all day.

  11. It’s amazing to me how few of my friends and family know about, or have heard of, set-point theory. I fully support it, and know about it because of my past with an ED. Its frustrating to live in a society whose messages still scream “you control your weight/body”. I appreciate blogs like yours that remind me that my body knows how to take care of itself and that weight does not equate to health. Set point weight theory has been a protective barrier between me and diet culture when it comes to the desire to engage in weight control behaviors.
    I deleted my personal Instagram at the beginning of may! One of the main reasons I felt conflicted on deleting it was accounts like yours, and other ED recovery supportive accounts, but I still felt like I was spending way to much time scrolling so I took the jump and deleted it from my phone. And wow. Not having my personal Instagram account has felt so freeing. The constant comparison, and the reaching for my phone habit has decreased significantly. I’m just happier, and I feel like there’s more space in my brain for creativity. It’s amazing what the power of the “delete” button will do!

  12. My weight has ranged wildly (Within a 100 pound fluctuation) since I was about 18 years old and 12 years later I still have have absolutely no idea what my set point is … it’s a very confusing concept for me. 

    I gave up Facebook about 6 years ago and Instagram about 3 years ago. I love my social media free life. For me, It leads to more authentic connections with friends, more interesting conversations, more leisure time, and less stress. 

  13. Been at my set-point range (+/- 5lbs, not that I weigh myself, mostly a guess) for four years. Mentally: happiest and most content I’ve ever been. Physically: body still changes a lot in composition within that weight range, which is fascinating. A thing that comes with aging, I suppose! (I’m 30 now).

  14. Hi Kylie!

    I, like so many others, cannot wait for your post on Set Point Weight Range. I find it so fascinating. When I lost my period due to undereating and overexercising, it wasn’t until I got back to the exact weight I was before I lost my period that I got it back. Literally the exact same weight I was before! (I understand set point is a range, I just thought it was funny that it was the exact weight I used to be before I somehow convinced myself I was “too big”). Then I lost my period again, and low and behold, it wasn’t until I AGAIN went back to that previous exact same weight that my period came back. Our bodies are so smart. They can manage our weight just fine without us interfering (something I learned from you!). I am actually thankful that my body shut off my reproductive system as a signal to me that I was doing too much and had veered well below my set point weight. If it hadn’t, I probably would’ve kept up with my old habits.

    Looking forward to your post!

  15. When I embraced intuitive eating, I gained weight. It took another year to figure out the exercise part but now I see my body is definitely at its set point. I had to accept that my set point is higher than my desired weight from my ED days. I actually have no idea what I weigh and plan to keep it that way. I went to the doctor recently and requested a blind weight and was so thrilled to have a good experience about that. I can tell I’m at my set point because my clothes have fit the same for a few years now. There was this moment I realized my body knows what it’s doing and that trust really kicked in. It’s a good feeling. 
    Oh and the social media thing-totally agree. I learned so much via Instagram when I started the IE journey but I have come to realize that i have the knowledge I need now. I feel that is another type of trust we have to develop-trusting our own voice and not relying on others to lead us. That being said, I do appreciate this blog so much. 

  16. Hi Kylie! I DEFINITELY resonate with feeling frustrated with social media.I’m struggling to figure out how to use it in a way that really works for me. Also, I’m definitely a cream cheese girl! I find that the value of bagels is that they act as a vehicle for cream cheese…lol

    Okay…weight set point. I settled into my weight set point while I was taking a break from exercise for about two years, aside from walking. Once I started exercising again, my weight didn’t change very much, and I used that as a measuring stick to make sure I was nourishing my body enough and not overdoing it with the exercise. (Or rather, my clothing size didn’t change. I wasn’t weighing myself regularly.)

    I find the truth of my weight set point to be really freeing because I don’t like when my body changes. I realize that changes are normal, healthy, and to be expected, but I am personally still in a place where the thought of my body changing seems scary. Knowing that my body has a weight it *wants* to be gives me a lot of peace, because I know that it won’t suddenly change drastically without warning unless a) I have a health problem, or b) I become pregnant.

  17. I love the idea of a blog on set point theory! It is such a hard concept to understand and come to terms with, so it can sometimes be difficult to explain. I have been at my set point for about 5 years. I think my favorite part of knowing my set point is that it is a constant validation that I don’t need to do anything except listen to my body. No diets, no over-exercising, no weighing myself. I can trust that if (for the most part) I listen to my hunger and fullness cues and move for enjoyment, my body will do exactly what it needs to do to keep myself healthy & happy.

  18. Hi Kylie! I am so excited to read about set point range. I started IE about a year and a half ago and I think I’ve been at my set point range for about a year at this point. I’m noticing the clothes from last summer largely still fit and throughout I’ve been doing my regular thing and listening to my body. Although, I haven’t weighed myself for fear of being triggered which I think is fine. I think settling has been really freeing but I definitely feel some anxiety occasionally when I feel like a pair of pants is a bit tight one morning or that a photo doesn’t capture my body quite right. I’m still a bit afraid of gaining more weight if my body needs to because I feel like I’ve already become significantly more comfortable in my body as it is right now. I would like to come to terms with that feeling eventually!

  19. I think I may be at my set point—I have stayed at roughly the same size (wearing the same clothes) for about 5 years now (I had two children in that period, but my body adjusted back to a similar size fairly quickly without me doing anything to try to manipulate my size). It’s interesting that my exercise level and diet has fluctuated with seasons but my size stays Fairly consistent. I’m still not sure if I’m at my set point because I still have some restrictive eating behaviors, mostly around avoiding simple carbs unless they are a handful of foods that I really enjoy, and because my consistent weight is well within the BMI “healthy” size (IE I am fairly thin). Most of my family is built small, so it makes sense that my set point would be low, but I still have some guilt and fear around not eating sandwiches 😂 

  20. I’ve been at my set point for a few years now, and one of the thing I’ve noticed is that my weight still changes seasonally! I don’t weigh myself, but I would guess it’s a 15ish pound difference from mid-winter to mid-summer, and typically I make sure my winter clothes have a baggier fit than my summer clothes. This used to freak me out, but I’ve realized that it’s just a lifestyle difference and nothing to worry about. I tend to spend most of my time outside in the summer, and in the winter I move less and bake a lot more (because I hate cold and come on, baked goods and coffee on cold days is the best.) I’ve had to rally work on being okay with body changes, because I know that it happens for totally normal reasons and doesn’t mean that I “messed up” or anything like that. I’m almost certain this is still within my set point because I don’t just gain weight steadily until I start doing weird restrictive things- I just kind of boop up to the top of my set point range, stay there for several months, boop back down to the bottom of the range, and stay there for several months. Rinse and repeat. Being able to just let my body do its thing has been rad.

  21. I have been at my set point (thanks to your help getting me there with IE and so much more) for almost 4 years. It is SO freeing. I honestly find myself thinking back to what I would’ve done prior to finding IE and better body image and it all sounds so silly now. It’s hard to get to the point where you can trust yourself but once you do, it’s so worth it. I find that I’m so much more outgoing now because I do not have fearful situations with going out for spontaneous ice cream or a drink or such. I know that my body will take care of me and let me know what I need. Thank you for all you do!

  22. What I realized about my set point was that, regardless of what diet I was or wasn’t on, or what punitive exercise regimen I was pushing myself through, I was pretty much the same clothing size and weight. When I wasn’t, the difference was so slight it probably wasn’t noticeable to most people. I have come to a place where I accept HAES and am open to my body changing, as I know it will over the course of my life. However, I realize that the effort and abuse I put my body through didn’t even get the result I was working toward! So there is literally no reason to put myself through dieting or crazy exercise that makes me miserable. May as well be mentally healthy and happy – and of course, intuitive eating makes me physically healthier too.

    Another thing I realized is that it takes more food than I would ever have guessed to maintain my set point. This was even true for me before pregnancy y (I am breastfeeding now so it’s definitely the case at the moment). Obviously I know now that my body was trying to protect itself from what it perceived as famine when I dieted in the past. I am so much happier and have so much more mental space for what is important in my life when I am physically satisfied.

  23. I am with you on social media. I have a 10 minute limit for facebook & IG and even that seems too much some days. I did a social media fast last month for 2 weeks and I think it’s going to be a monthly thing possibly?
    I’ve gotta make that breakfast casserole. I love everything bagels & everything but the bagel seasoning. Sounds like a good idea to make for breakfast for the week!

    • Hi Kylie,
      I am looking forward to your post on set point weight!
      I believe I have been at my set point for the last 3 years or so.
      My weight continues to fluctuate throughout the month, but over the last three years whether I am in a season of not including intentional movement in my weekly routines or my day to day diet looks different than normal, my weight stays the same. There are a few things that have surprised me during this time. One is I thought I would know and be able to recognize quickly that I was at my set point weight, but it really has taken me the past three years of seeing my body (relatively)not change through different seasons to realize and trust I am at my set point. The other is that I thought being at set point would mean the absence of any anxieties around food, movement, or weight gain and that is definitely not true! I have certainly grown to trust my body more, trust the Lord to care for my body’s needs, and have more tools to deal with anxieties that arise. But at the end of the day I can still have tendencies toward disordered thoughts at times. I think this makes sense and is probably natural, but it was different than how I had characterized what I thought it would be like to be at my set point.
      Grateful for your continued work and encouragement on this platform ❤️

  24. I’ve been an intuitive eater for the last five years and at my “set range” for most of those five. I don’t weight myself but I have a certain pair of jeans that fits well and I tend to always fit in them, so I assume my weight is fairly stable for these jeans to fit well. However a more interesting thing to me is that I’ve experienced three pregnancies in the last six years (currently midway through the third) and my body has gained EXACTLY the same amount of weight in each pregnancy at the halfway point, regardless of how I was eating. In my first pregnancy my cravings were so different than my normal cravings. In my second pregnancy, I was queasy/throwing up every day and eating so many beige comfort foods (bread, crackers, grilled cheese), and this time around I’ve just been starving in general and eating everything that’s not nailed down. I find it very cool that my body knows just how to gain in pregnancy and that it’s been the same each time. After my first kiddo, I returned to my “normal” size very quickly. It took longer the second time around and even when I was “back” my body looked very different. I imagine it will be more of the same this time around and I’m honestly not concerned at all about it! 

  25. Pingback: Some set point weight theory reflections. – Yeah…Immaeatthat

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