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Favorite part of you.

This is a post I’ve been mulling over for a long time too.  Last week I talked about how I believe that you (and me) deserve to have a positive opinion of yourself that does not change when you see a photo of yourself you don’t like.  So that brings me to this post.  

About two years ago I was hanging out with a friend of mine. She was telling a story about someone who gave her a compliment about something and then she said, “but that isn’t my favorite thing about myself.”

It caught me off guard. At the time I’d never really thought about what my favorite thing about myself was.  I believe we deserve to have a positive opinion of ourselves that does not change when we get on a scale or see a photo of ourselves we don’t like. 

For me, I like how I’m able to have self-compassion. I like how I’ve created more space in my life to be kind to myself.  My default is to be very judgemental about whatever I’m going through or feeling, so I like the part of me that practices being more self-compassionate and not being filled with self-hatred.  Life is already hard enough and is so much harder if I’m not even rooting for me.  I like that these days I have more grace for myself.

I’ve asked family/friends what is there favorite thing about themselves.  Some like their optimism and one said his favorite thing about himself is that he’s been chosen by God. 

So if you had to choose your favorite part about you, what would it be? 

My disordered eating and drive to become thinner couldn’t survive in an ocean of self-compassion.  I hope you don’t spend your life trapped in your disordered eating or desire to become smaller…never getting to meet the wonderful bits of you that your disorder behaviors are keeping you from.

25 comments

  1. I love this. I love my kindness and my humor.

  2. This is such a great message! My favorite thing about myself is how adaptable I am—I think that I can mold myself pretty easily to be the best version of myself in new situations without losing my identity.
    Thanks for this, Kylie! 

  3. I like that I’m very solution-oriented — that’s kind of a business-y way of saying it, I guess, but I think that applies to my non-work life too. I’m working on not being judgmental about my feelings/feeling my feelings, but I think the thing I’d like to keep is that I don’t wallow for long. When a problem presents itself or something doesn’t go as planned, it’s definitely helpful and cathartic to feel “this really sucks! I wish this were different/not happening!” …for a few minutes. But then I’m good at being like…okay, this is the situation, here are all the factors, where do we go from here?  

    Which also helps me stay calm under pressure/in stressful situations — again, something that’s helpful in my work life, but in my non-work life I like that I can be someone who keeps a level head when other people are freaking out about something.

  4. I like that I’m usually pretty good at finding the positives in any situation.  Even the bad things that have happend I can look back & see the lesson learned, or how it made me stronger.  And that I’m pretty accepting & try to look at life from other’s point of view instead of always thinking my way is the only right way (:  

  5. I love this post and you look so beautiful and happy and glowing in that photo!

    Something I’ve noticed is when I look at photos of myself during the time when I wasn’t kind to my body and hated it for not being this or that, I often don’t look happy (even if my body is more “ideal”). I look at photos of myself now and I’m truly smiling – like TRULY, because I’m so much happier when I don’t let my weight dictate my worth.

  6. My favorite thing about myself is how I am a planner. For so long I was told this was not good and that it needed to be fixed. I have now seen that God has created me like this! Yes, it can be used in a negative way, but I can also utilize it to serve God in ways that work with his word. The parts of us that we may think is our downfall can truly be a gift from God, its all about how we frame them.

  7. I think my favorite thing about myself is my ability to listen to others. I truly enjoy listening and getting to know someone just by listening to them talk! :)

  8. I really enjoy my creativity- not just through art, but creativity in day to day situations, whether that be when it comes out in conversations, thinking of a way to help someone else out, or even just a new creative way to solve a problem. I also love that I can see needs in others, and have a desire to make others feel better.

  9. It’s a bit sad but my mind immediately went to physical things, darn diet culture! But I am trying to focus on the non-aesthetic things I like. For example I like my legs because I live on a hill and they get me up it at the end of the day. Other than that I like how I am good at picking up on how people are feeling and showing kindness and compassion. If someone if having an off day or is stressed I will notice and try do something little for them (like leave a happy note on a co-workers desk, get them a surprise coffee and so on) to make their day better.

    • That’s so sweet to do things for others! My best friend used to say, “never suppress an act of generosity”…sounds like you are great at that!

  10. Thanks for the post, Kylie! I think my favorite thing about myself is my sense of humor. I can make people laugh that deep-belly laugh.

  11. Loving these last two posts, Kylie! I appreciate that the things you and others told you that were their favorites were not related to physical appearance. Learning about mindfulness has taught me a lot about being overly attached to things mentally. With disordered eating, it feels like all we can see is our physical bodies, and we are unable to see ourselves as whole people! During the recovery process, I’ve definitely been able to tap into a life full of passions outside of food and body and feel like a more “whole” person. It’s always inspiring to hear of others doing the same and thinking outside of the narrow box diet culture tries to put us in.

  12. This post is amazing (as most of your posts are). I love that I am learning to take care of myself and do the hard and deep inner work involved in this. I love that I am able to love and care for my 10 month old daughter and start to pave the way that she can grow up not seeing a mother who is on and off diets and loathing her body and size <3

  13. I think my favorite aspect of myself is my love of crafting. :) I enjoy seeing something start to finish that I make instead of just buying something because it gives me such a satisfied feeling & often times saves money! I did quite a bit of crafting for my wedding: wooden signs for my sweetheart table & chalk signs as well as spray painting wine bottles & cutting wooden biscuits for my centerpieces. Now I have all of these pieces in my house that I love to look at. :)

    • You did an awesome job on them too! I was so proud of you. 

      I think my favorite part of myself is my headstrong/stubborn personality trait. By that I mean no matter how much anxiety can get to me at times, making me want to just give up, I keep fighting it. I never gave up when things got really tough in school & saw my master’s through to become an RD. 

  14. This post reminds me of a super helpful practice I did while in recovery, all about reframing some of my ED tendencies into their healthy-self traits (which helped me connect with who I was before ED kind of distorted/took over my personality).

    For example, my drive for self improvement–> ED turned it into perfectionism/numbers-based/never good enough. But for my healthy self –> this brings out my determined, goal-oriented, never give up side, which I love.

    Not sure if that makes sense, but reclaiming some of those traits was a very healing part of my recovery and helped me rediscover many of my favorite things about me!

  15. I love my humor. I realized one day that I didn’t want to be shy or timid…and something in me came out. I like the fact that I dont care what other people think when I act silly or goofy. That is the fun part :) i am in love with your posts by the way. I have boughts of disordered thinking and right now it has been tough and all of your posts are helping immensely. So thank you❤

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