5 thoughts
1. I wanted to share that Leah Ryan Mitchell joined our family in July!
We are now a family of 5 with three little girls. Andrew and I both feel this is a lot of children lol. We love them all so much! And we are very tired!! Below is a photo of our little caboose. I did share some about the pregnancy on this multi-episode podcast book club I did with Alyssa Pike (the episodes I’m on are mostly the ones titled: Sacred Rhythms).
For those of you who enjoy birth things, my water broke in the middle of the night at 37 weeks + 1 day. And then…labor did not start on it’s own. We ended up using Pitocin and an epidural and Leah came right out. We had a NICU stay and that was really terrible, but I don’t want to talk about that here. We are all home now. And, as my sister once put it really well, “there are growing pains as to be expected with adding another kiddo” (the first week we were all home was total chaos with some of the biggest tantrums we have ever seen from the big girls), but we’ve made it to the other side and it has been smoother sailing since then.
2. I’m very happy to not be pregnant anymore.
I usually feel the most depressed and anxious during pregnancy, and that was no different this time. I worked with a reproductive psychiatrist this time, so that has helped, and a therapist. Jo’s postpartum was horrific with colic and (for me) navigating the life adjustment that comes with having your first kid when so much of my identity was in work at the time. Ella’s postpartum was so much better. I didn’t have to donate any baby clothes from Ella’s newborn days because they were associated with a memory that made me shutter in fear. I donated a lot of Jo’s clothes! This postpartum has been really okay. During Leah’s 6 week sleep regression I had one night that I started crying from the lack of sleep and overwhelm, but otherwise I’m having Andrew help a lot more in the middle of the night than I did with the other girls. I think a lot of this shows progress in my own self-worth, with asking Andrew to help and not feeling responsible or required to fix his exhaustion the next day.
A friend put it well recently with, “postpartum is like this dark pit you are about to fall into. You don’t know when you’re going to fall, but at the end of pregnancy you get to this place of, let’s just go ahead and get this baby out so we can fall and start making our way out of the pit.” Agreed.
I’ve been able to be way more positive this postpartum. I attribute this to many factors, but mostly taking Sertraline, MommaStrong’s hazy days program, and this being my third postpartum. My plan for this postpartum has been to view any problem I come up against as it is me and Andrew against the problem, not that Andrew not doing enough is the problem. I’ve been able to do that and it has helped a lot. Andrew’s capacity as a dad has also drastically expanded over the years. He is doing a lot and I’m really proud of him and us. And I’m really happy. I rarely feel like I’m doing something wrong. Babies be babies and they cry and are unpredictable for a bit and that is just how this goes.
Here are some pictures from pregnancy, if ya wanna see!
3. Trying on my pre-pregnancy clothes.
I typically try on my non-maternity clothes once I need something else to wear. Postpartum I keep around a lot of different sizes as I know my body will most likely change over the next year plus. The below shorts fit right before getting pregnant with Leah, now, as to be expected (for me, anyways), not so much. I’ll leave them at the top of my closet and try them again in a few months.
My neighbor brought over some clothes that are too big for her and some of her jeans fit me…woohoo. I put on the below purple top with the jeans, didn’t love the fit, but then Jo walked in and said, “*gasp* Mommy, you look like a ballerina!” I love children. The fit and flare of the bottom of the shirt looked like a tutu to her.
4. The pregnancy and postpartum of Muddy Buddies
For the first month of postpartum the only thing I craved was Puppy Chow/Muddy Buddies. I made batch after batch and had it for meals and snacks. I’d have to force myself to eat a sandwich or a salad occasionally, but I had no appetite. The emotional toll of the NICU stay + postpartum hormones really had me feeling terrible. At one point I started having, what I think may have been an acute gallbladder attack from the really high level of stress and the level of fat that was coming in from my main fuel source being Muddy Buddies.
I hated not feeling like myself with my appetite. Even breakfast, my favorite meal of the day, sounded terrible and if it wasn’t Muddy Buddies I had to force something else down. I really started to miss enjoyment of food being easy. Around 4 weeks postpartum my bleeding stopped and two days later my appetite came back, which makes me think a lot of what I was feeling was caused by hormones. So grateful to be back enjoying a wide variety of foods now.
5. I’m still figuring out what I can and can’t handle when it comes to sharing on the internet.
I deleted the @immaEATthat instagram account, because I can’t handle Instagram. I wasn’t sure how much of my worth was in building a large instagram following, rather than being a child of God who has worth because of that, and I decided that deleting the account was the best way (and the most impulsive way) to find out. I’m happy with my decision to delete the account. I do not miss it. My sin struggle with people pleasing (idolizing other’s opinions over God’s) makes it very difficult for me to be on there. Praise God that he made Instagram stop being fun for me and made it really easy to leave behind. IG has been so easy to let go of.
I can feel like the blog has to capture everything I am and am doing or it is disingenuous, but regardless of feeling that…I’d like to share some things on here again. I like writing here and I miss it. I miss interacting with you readers who comment and benefit from my writing and I miss benefiting from your comments. Not many share a perspective of not eliminating foods and taking care of their body but just letting it be the size it ends up, so I like getting to share here as a support to you…but also as a huge support to me. Advocating for the things I share, helps my life. And, finally, I miss sharing the foods I’m enjoying and making for my family. Also, my clients who find me through the blog tend to be a really good fit for me, and I tend to be a really good fit for them! This blog is the best referral source I have and it is a genuine and caring way of marketing that feels right for me. Sharing on the internet is hard for me because I want to be 100% honest about things, but that isn’t good to do on the internet. So I’ll settle for sharing some and hope readers know that you’re not seeing all the hard stuff, or all the good stuff, you’re just seeing some of the stuff. Also, I can’t decide if I’m okay with sharing my kids faces online or not, but since trying to decide if I’m yay or nay on the topic makes my head feel like it’s gonna explode, I’m just not going to share their sweet faces once they are out of the baby phase. But know, they are as wonderful, smart, and perfect as ever.
Thanks for reading! I’ve missed sharing!
Congratulations on the new baby! Thank you for sharing – I have definitely benefited from your blog over the years and appreciate your perspective. I have also struggled with eating and body size and have been encouraged by your openness about your journey. Once again, congrats and welcome back.
Yay!!! Congratulations! Was so happy / surprised to see your post. And so happy for you and your family and surviving postpartum (it’s HARD). Can’t wait to read more.
Congratulations on the beautiful new little one! I really enjoy your posts, any and all of them, so thank you for being vulnerable to share what’s on your heart again!
Congrats on the new baby!! So happy to see a post from you. You helped me get out of the disordered eating headspace before becoming pregnant and that was such a gift to not be wrapped up in food and body size while growing a baby. I also enjoy your posts on motherhood, thanks for your honesty and thoughtfulness.. it helps to make sense of this crazy phase of life.
I’m so glad you are back to sharing. I have missed your blogs so much. You have been so helpful in my own recovery from disordered eating over several years. I have struggled to with not blogging and not posting on IG as I am trying to figure out that balance. Blogging for me was always a creative outlet. Thank you for sharing your own journey in learning to find that balance. I am so happy to see you and your family doing well!
Congratulations on your gorgeous baby!! I am so happy to see a post, I love your writing style and enjoy your blog so much!!
Your writing and blog is a gift! So happy all is well!!! Thank you Jesus we serve a God who loves us so much he will tear down our idols. You blog was so healing for me and the Lord used it 10000%!
Congratulations!
Congratulations! Nice to “hear” from you- you sound great :)
I’ve missed you! Congratulations on your tiny new beautiful Leah.
Thanks so much for the post! Congratulations on your sweet baby and on navigating all the challenges that came with this girly! I’ve followed your blog for several years, don’t often comment on posts, but just wanted to say that you are an inspiration to me in your realness. Not a lot of people have that, and I’m grateful for your perspective on life and growing, self image and otherwise. Thanks for who you are, and for sharing the things you feel comfortable sharing. It’s a pretty huge gift. I definitely understood when you wanted to take a break, and I’m also glad you’re back in whatever capacity you decide is best for you.
What a pleasant surprise to see you in my inbox again! Congratulations on your sweet baby girl!
I was so happy to see this post pop up on my reader! I was just wondering the other day If you had gotten off Instagram. I figured you had because my favorite people always do… I should take that as a sign. Congratulations on your new little love. I’m a few weeks away from welcoming our fourth and so excited to not be pregnant anymore and for the newborn cuddles and also dreading the newborn phase. And now I crave muddy buddies! Hang in there mama and I hope we hear from you again soon ❤️
Congratulations Kylie & family!!! Thank you so much for the update and great surprise of a blog entry! You are definitely missed here but happy for where you are in life! xo
I was so happy to see this pop up in my inbox! Your blog was always my favorite and I’ve missed it! Congrats on baby Leah! And thanks for your honesty as always!
Congrats, Kylie – what a beautiful family you have. Excited to hear and learn from you whenever it’s right for you to pop back on :)
Kylie, so good to get an update on your life and family! I have cherished your perspectives through your blog these last few years. I’m so happy for your growing family and wish you guys all the best! Thanks for all the content you put out- it’s so refreshing to read and learn from! :)
Kylie, congratulations! I was so excited to see your post pop up in my blog reader.
3 girls! What a blessing. I’m so happy for you, as a fellow mom of girls. Sending you love and strength through all the messy and imperfect ups and downs. <3
Congratulations! I was happy to see the post notification and I would love to read more from you again, if it feels right for you. I benefit from your posts and go back and read old ones sometimes.
Congratulations on your new baby!! And super excited to see you back here after some time :)
Congratulations on baby girl #3! Encouraged by you & hearing how God is sanctifying you through motherhood. I, too, find your openness about body size helpful on my own journey finding my worth in Christ & not my body size or in my work. Praying for you now as you navigate postpartum.
I was reading an old blog post of mine that mentioned you and realized I hadn’t “seen” you in a while – the deleting Instagram explains that! So I came over here and just spent 30 minutes catching up on all.the.things. on your site. I can’t believe you have THREE girls now – congratulations!! I’m glad you are all doing well. xoxoxo
Oh my goodness congrats! I was just thinking about you and decided to pop on and what an update! Missed your blog and would love to see more whenever you feel like it ❤️
Thanks, Maddie!
Congratulations, Kylie! I remember when you were thinking about whether or not to have a third. So amazing to see Leah in your arms now. Thanks, as always, for your transparency and honesty. Peace to you and yours.
I am so glad we have her. How hard I find postpartum could’ve kept me from getting pregnant again and I’m so glad it didn’t. Thanks for reading, Megan<3
What a wonderful surprise to see an update from your blog in my email. Congratulations on your gorgeous baby and thank you for sharing. Your blog has been so valuable for my eating journey.
Congrats on your sweet baby!!! So happy to see a post from you!! Thank you for sharing with us, your blog has helped me through so many hard times. And you are right, it’s hard to find anyone sharing about not eliminating foods and caring for their bodies. Grateful for you!
I am just now getting caught up on your more recent posts, Kylie <3 I'm so glad to see that you are posting again. Your blog has always been so uplifting and fun to follow <3
I’m so glad!
Kylee,
I love your blog! I am 25 and have been reading your blog off and on for six years. I am so happy your back to posting more. May God bless you and your holiday!
I’m so glad you’re back!!! :) I also don’t like IG but reading old school style blogs is my favorite! Congrats on your baby girl and Merry Christmas!
Congratulations on the birth of your third daughter! So happy to see you back to blogging!!
Lovely to hear you are back Kylie! Congratulations on the new addition. Looking forward to hearing from you again and hopefully more recipes to come (I’m suddenly craving muddy buddies now even though I’m Australian and have no idea what they are).
I missed you! I just found the blog alert in my email and my week has been made 🥰 Congratulations on your newest bundle and thanks for keeping us around :)
Kylie, I am so excited to see you are blogging again. I was thinking of you and looked you up and I see that I have missed some things! 5 years ago, I was struggling with an eating disorder and in the worst place of my life. I found your blog and it helped me get through a very tough time. I am so glad to begin reading again! Thank you for helping me! I am so happy for you and your beautiful family!
Welcome back, Kristen <3 I'm happy to be blogging again :)
We were talking about good snacks today and I remembered your no bake monster balls and looked up the blog in hopes that the recipes were still live. I’ve also divorced myself from instagram and overall the nutrition influencer world. It was such a wonderful surprise to see recent blogs. I’ve always loved the honesty with which you speak about living in our bodies. So happy to have your voice back in my brain.
Thanks for the encouragement, Yvonne! I love that wording of “happy to have your voice back in my brain.” I appreciate it:)
I was so glad to see your recent blog post notification in my email (which I do not keep up with and only find things in sporadically!). When I saw your little kitchen helper, I realized I’d missed a life event and went scrolling through your archives to see if you’d posted about it. I enjoyed reading about it in this post!
I have a piece of your artwork in our living room (a breathe in/breathe out ocean watercolor) and think of you often because of it. I admire your willingness accept and seek out your own personal evolution. For as long as sharing continues to feel right for you, I’ll be one of the folks out there enjoying hearing from you. And I’ll always be cheering you on!
Kylie! I was going through a hard time and decided to read one of your old posts over lunch time and then I saw that there are new posts and it was so exciting! So happy you’re back, love your blog so much!
Hi Erin!! Glad we found each other again!